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* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs Christoph Heiss
                   ` (8 more replies)
  0 siblings, 9 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

This series in short tries to bring the documentation for the
ISO installation flow and anything related to it in line the with
respective documentation for PMG. As both products use the same
installer (minus small differences such as LVM options and BTRFS
support) and overall same basic system setup, it is worth to unify them.

This also brings the benefit that future changes should be more easily
adaptable to both.

As this essentially takes the "best of both worlds" in tries to combine
them, an accompanying series is also provided for `pmg-docs` on the
respective mailing list - so please also take a look there.

FWIW; happy to further improve these sections if there suggestions,
since I'm already changing a lot anyway.

RFC: It might be worth to introduce some common/shared documentation
"base" for PVE & PMG? There are definitely some more things that could
be shared. E.g. the ZFS administration guide, that is also applicable
to PMG.

Christoph Heiss (9):
  gitignore: add package build outputs
  asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs
  local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs
  getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs
  package-repos: align wording with pmg-docs
  installation: iso: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  installation: lvm-options: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  installation: zfs-options: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  installation: iso: reflow location and password dialog screenshots

 .gitignore                 |   3 +
 asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf |   1 +
 getting-help.adoc          |  10 +--
 local-btrfs.adoc           |   8 +-
 pve-installation.adoc      | 148 ++++++++++++++++++++++++-------------
 pve-package-repos.adoc     |  18 +++--
 6 files changed, 120 insertions(+), 68 deletions(-)

--
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-06 17:16   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
                   ` (7 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

.. much like it many other repos.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 .gitignore | 3 +++
 1 file changed, 3 insertions(+)

diff --git a/.gitignore b/.gitignore
index 17044d5..627b39e 100644
--- a/.gitignore
+++ b/.gitignore
@@ -5,6 +5,9 @@
 *.tmp
 *.epub
 *.swp
+/*.deb
+/*.changes
+/*.buildinfo
 /#*#
 /.pve-doc-depends
 /api-viewer/apidoc.js
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-06 17:16   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs Christoph Heiss
                   ` (6 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

Seems like a pretty sensible thing to do here too.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf | 1 +
 getting-help.adoc          | 2 +-
 pve-package-repos.adoc     | 2 +-
 3 files changed, 3 insertions(+), 2 deletions(-)

diff --git a/asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf b/asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf
index 8407595..0c28298 100644
--- a/asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf
+++ b/asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf
@@ -3,6 +3,7 @@
 proxmoxGmbh=Proxmox Server Solutions GmbH
 copyright=Proxmox Server Solutions GmbH
 pve=Proxmox VE
+pricing-url=https://proxmox.com/en/proxmox-virtual-environment/pricing
 website=https://www.proxmox.com/
 forum-url=https://forum.proxmox.com/
 forum=https://forum.proxmox.com/[Proxmox VE Community Forum]
diff --git a/getting-help.adoc b/getting-help.adoc
index 28b23ee..e733adf 100644
--- a/getting-help.adoc
+++ b/getting-help.adoc
@@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ Commercial Support
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
 {proxmoxGmbh} also offers enterprise support available as
-https://www.proxmox.com/en/proxmox-virtual-environment/pricing[{pve} Subscription Service Plans].
+{pricing-url}[{pve} Subscription Service Plans].
 All users with a subscription get access to the {pve}
 <<sysadmin_enterprise_repo,Enterprise Repository>>, and--with a Basic, Standard
 or Premium subscription--also to the Proxmox Customer Portal. The customer
diff --git a/pve-package-repos.adoc b/pve-package-repos.adoc
index 89d041e..b0c2a95 100644
--- a/pve-package-repos.adoc
+++ b/pve-package-repos.adoc
@@ -71,7 +71,7 @@ The `root@pam` user is notified via email about available updates. Click the
 
 You need a valid subscription key to access the `pve-enterprise` repository.
 Different support levels are available. Further details can be found at
-https://www.proxmox.com/en/proxmox-virtual-environment/pricing.
+{pricing-url}.
 
 NOTE: You can disable this repository by commenting out the above line using a
 `#` (at the start of the line). This prevents error messages if your host does
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-06 17:19   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
                   ` (5 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

It's mostly spelled BTRFS anyway in our documentation (and also the
official casing AFAICS), so align a few instances where it spelled
lowercase.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 local-btrfs.adoc | 8 ++++----
 1 file changed, 4 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)

diff --git a/local-btrfs.adoc b/local-btrfs.adoc
index b04d0a3..3512131 100644
--- a/local-btrfs.adoc
+++ b/local-btrfs.adoc
@@ -69,10 +69,10 @@ btrfs: local-btrfs
 	content iso,vztmpl,backup,images,rootdir
 ----
 
-This explicitly disables the default `local` storage in favor of a btrfs
+This explicitly disables the default `local` storage in favor of a BTRFS
 specific storage entry on the additional subvolume.
 
-The `btrfs` command is used to configure and manage the btrfs file system,
+The `btrfs` command is used to configure and manage the BTRFS file system,
 After the installation, the following command lists all additional subvolumes:
 
 ----
@@ -156,7 +156,7 @@ pvesm add btrfs my-storage --path /my-storage
 Creating a subvolume
 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 
-Creating a subvolume links it to a path in the btrfs file system, where it will
+Creating a subvolume links it to a path in the BTRFS file system, where it will
 appear as a regular directory.
 
 ----
@@ -218,7 +218,7 @@ This change will take effect after rebooting.
 Checking Space Usage
 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 
-The classic `df` tool may output confusing values for some btrfs setups.
+The classic `df` tool may output confusing values for some BTRFS setups.
 For a better estimate use the `btrfs filesystem usage /PATH` command, for example:
 
 ----
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (2 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-06 17:19   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: " Christoph Heiss
                   ` (4 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

This paragraph as phrased in pmg-docs sounds better & reads easier, so
apply it here too.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 getting-help.adoc | 8 ++++----
 1 file changed, 4 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)

diff --git a/getting-help.adoc b/getting-help.adoc
index e733adf..06a25c2 100644
--- a/getting-help.adoc
+++ b/getting-help.adoc
@@ -16,10 +16,10 @@ documentation with user contributed content.
 Community Support Forum
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
-We always encourage our users to discuss and share their knowledge using the
-{forum}. The forum is moderated by the Proxmox support team. The large user base
-is spread out all over the world. Needless to say that such a large forum is a
-great place to get information.
+{pve} itself is fully open source, so we always encourage our users to discuss
+and share their knowledge using the {forum}. The forum is moderated by the
+Proxmox support team, and has a large user base from all around the world.
+Needless to say, such a large forum is a great place to get information.
 
 Mailing Lists
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (3 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-05  8:28   ` Gabriel Goller
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & " Christoph Heiss
                   ` (3 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

These are phrased better and more expansive in pmg-docs, so take them
from there and only slightly adapt naming as needed.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 pve-package-repos.adoc | 18 ++++++++++++------
 1 file changed, 12 insertions(+), 6 deletions(-)

diff --git a/pve-package-repos.adoc b/pve-package-repos.adoc
index b0c2a95..1f23078 100644
--- a/pve-package-repos.adoc
+++ b/pve-package-repos.adoc
@@ -69,9 +69,14 @@ deb https://enterprise.proxmox.com/debian/pve bookworm pve-enterprise
 The `root@pam` user is notified via email about available updates. Click the
 'Changelog' button in the GUI to see more details about the selected update.
 
-You need a valid subscription key to access the `pve-enterprise` repository.
-Different support levels are available. Further details can be found at
-{pricing-url}.
+As soon as updates are available, the `root@pam` user is notified via email
+about the newly available packages. From the GUI, the 'Changelog' button in the
+GUI can be used to see more details about the selected update.
+Thus, you will never miss important security fixes.
+
+Please note that you need a valid subscription key to access the
+`pve-enterprise` repository. We offer different support levels, which you can
+find further details about at {pricing-url}.
 
 NOTE: You can disable this repository by commenting out the above line using a
 `#` (at the start of the line). This prevents error messages if your host does
@@ -82,9 +87,10 @@ repository in that case.
 {pve} No-Subscription Repository
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
-This is the recommended repository for testing and non-production use. Its
-packages are not as heavily tested and validated. You don't need a subscription key
-to access the `pve-no-subscription` repository.
+As the name suggests, you do not need a subscription key to access
+this repository. It can be used for testing and non-production
+use. It's not recommended to use this on production servers, as these
+packages are not always heavily tested and validated.
 
 We recommend to configure this repository in `/etc/apt/sources.list`.
 
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (4 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-05  8:38   ` Gabriel Goller
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 7/9] installation: lvm-options: " Christoph Heiss
                   ` (2 subsequent siblings)
  8 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

New paragraphs were taken from pmg-docs and adapted. Most changes
here are the result of basically "diffing" both documentations, choosing
the better prased/sounding sections. Some wording were slightly changed
as necessary to further improve them.

The equivalent changes will be done for pmg-docs too, to ensure they are
really the same in the end.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 pve-installation.adoc | 123 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++--------------
 1 file changed, 82 insertions(+), 41 deletions(-)

diff --git a/pve-installation.adoc b/pve-installation.adoc
index 6b44fc0..e384f49 100644
--- a/pve-installation.adoc
+++ b/pve-installation.adoc
@@ -43,7 +43,7 @@ The installer ISO image includes the following:
 * Complete operating system (Debian Linux, 64-bit)
 
 * The {pve} installer, which partitions the local disk(s) with ext4, XFS,
-  BTRFS (technology preview), or ZFS and installs the operating system.
+  BTRFS (technology preview), or ZFS and installs the operating system
 
 * {pve} Linux kernel with KVM and LXC support
 
@@ -52,9 +52,9 @@ The installer ISO image includes the following:
 
 * Web-based management interface
 
-NOTE: All existing data on the for installation selected drives will be removed
-during the installation process. The installer does not add boot menu entries
-for other operating systems.
+NOTE: All existing data on the selected drives will be removed during the
+installation process. The installer does not add boot menu entries for other
+operating systems.
 
 Please insert the xref:installation_prepare_media[prepared installation media]
 (for example, USB flash drive or CD-ROM) and boot from it.
@@ -65,8 +65,8 @@ when booting an installer prior to {pve} version 8.1.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-grub-menu.png"]
 
-After choosing the correct entry (e.g. Boot from USB) the {pve} menu will be
-displayed and one of the following options can be selected:
+After choosing the correct entry (for example, 'Boot from USB') the {pve} menu
+will be displayed, and one of the following options can be selected:
 
 Install {pve} (Graphical)::
 
@@ -78,7 +78,7 @@ from the respective button. For example, `ALT + N` to press a `Next` button.
 
 Install {pve} (Terminal UI)::
 
-Starts the console-mode installation wizard. It provides the same overall
+Starts the terminal-mode installation wizard. It provides the same overall
 installation experience as the graphical installer, but has generally better
 compatibility with very old and very new hardware.
 
@@ -123,39 +123,46 @@ Runs `memtest86+`. This is useful to check if the memory is functional and free
 of errors. Secure Boot must be turned off in the UEFI firmware setup utility to
 run this option.
 
+You normally select *Install {pve} (Graphical)* to start the installation.
+
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-select-target-disk.png"]
 
-After selecting *Install {pve}* and accepting the EULA, the prompt to select the
-target hard disk(s) will appear. The `Options` button opens the dialog to select
-the target file system.
+The first step is to read our EULA (End User License Agreement). Following this,
+you can select the target hard disk(s) for the installation.
+
+CAUTION: By default, the whole server is used and all existing data is removed.
+Make sure there is no important data on the server before proceeding with the
+installation.
 
-The default file system is `ext4`. The Logical Volume Manager (LVM) is used when
-`ext4` or `xfs` is selected. Additional options to restrict LVM space
-can also be set (see <<advanced_lvm_options,below>>).
+The `Options` button lets you select the target file system, which
+defaults to `ext4`. The installer uses LVM if you select
+`ext4` or `xfs` as a file system, and offers additional options to
+restrict LVM space (see xref:advanced_lvm_options[below]).
 
-{pve} can be installed on ZFS. As ZFS offers several software RAID levels, this
-is an option for systems that don't have a hardware RAID controller. The target
-disks must be selected in the `Options` dialog. More ZFS specific settings can
-be changed under `Advanced Options` (see <<advanced_zfs_options,below>>).
+{pve} can also be installed on ZFS. As ZFS offers several software RAID levels,
+this is an option for systems that don't have a hardware RAID controller. The
+target disks must be selected in the `Options` dialog. More ZFS specific
+settings can be changed under xref:advanced_zfs_options[`Advanced Options`].
 
 WARNING: ZFS on top of any hardware RAID is not supported and can result in data
 loss.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-select-location.png", float="left"]
 
-The next page asks for basic configuration options like the location, the time
-zone, and keyboard layout. The location is used to select a download server
-close by to speed up updates. The installer usually auto-detects these settings.
-They only need to be changed in the rare case that auto detection fails or a
-different keyboard layout should be used.
+The next page asks for basic configuration options like your location, time
+zone, and keyboard layout. The location is used to select a nearby download
+server, in order to increase the speed of updates. The installer is usually able
+to auto-detect these settings, so you only need to change them in rare
+situations when auto-detection fails, or when you want to use a keyboard layout
+not commonly used in your country.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-set-password.png"]
 
-Next the password of the superuser (root) and an email address needs to be
+Next the password of the superuser (`root`) and an email address needs to be
 specified. The password must consist of at least 5 characters. It's highly
 recommended to use a stronger password. Some guidelines are:
 
-- Use a minimum password length of 12 to 14 characters.
+- Use a minimum password length of at least 12 characters.
 
 - Include lowercase and uppercase alphabetic characters, numbers, and symbols.
 
@@ -169,35 +176,69 @@ For example:
 
 - Information about available package updates.
 
-- Error messages from periodic CRON jobs.
+- Error messages from periodic 'cron' jobs.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-setup-network.png"]
 
-The last step is the network configuration. Network interfaces that are UP show
-a filled circle in front of their name in the drop down menu. Please note that
-during installation you can either use an IPv4 or IPv6 address, but not both. To
-configure a dual stack node, add additional IP addresses after the installation.
+All those notification mails will be sent to the specified email address.
+
+The last step is the network configuration. Network interfaces that are 'UP'
+show a filled circle in front of their name in the drop down menu. Please note
+that during installation you can either specify an IPv4 or IPv6 address, but not
+both. To configure a dual stack node, add additional IP addresses after the
+installation.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-installation.png", float="left"]
 
-The next step shows a summary of the previously selected options. Re-check every
-setting and use the `Previous` button if a setting needs to be changed. To
-accept, press `Install`. The installation starts to format disks and copies
-packages to the target. Please wait until this step has finished; then remove
-the installation medium and restart your system.
+The next step shows a summary of the previously selected options. Please
+re-check every setting and use the `Previous` button if a setting needs to be
+changed.
+
+After clicking `Install`, the installer will begin to format the disks and copy
+packages to the target disk(s). Please wait until this step has finished; then
+remove the installation medium and restart your system.
 
 [thumbnail="screenshot/pve-install-summary.png"]
 
+Copying the packages usually takes several minutes, mostly depending on the
+speed of the installation medium and the target disk performance.
+
+When copying and setting up the packages has finished, you can reboot the
+server. This will be done automatically after a few seconds by default.
+
+.Installation Failure
+
 If the installation failed, check out specific errors on the second TTY
-(`CTRL + ALT + F2') and ensure that the systems meets the
-xref:install_minimal_requirements[minimum requirements]. If the installation
-is still not working, look at the xref:getting_help[how to get help chapter].
+('CTRL + ALT + F2') and ensure that the systems meets the
+xref:install_minimal_requirements[minimum requirements].
+
+If the installation is still not working, look at the
+xref:getting_help[how to get help chapter].
+
+
+Accessing the Management Interface Post-Installation
+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
+
+[thumbnail="screenshot/gui-login-window.png"]
+
+After a succesful installation and reboot of the system you can use the {pve}
+web interface for further configuration.
+
+. Point your browser to the IP address given during the installation and port
+  8006, for example: https://youripaddress:8006
+
+. Log in using the `root` (realm 'PAM') username and the password chosen during
+installation.
+
+. Upload your subscription key to gain access to the Enterprise repository.
+  Otherwise, you will need to set up one of the public, less tested package
+  repositories to get updates for security fixes, bug fixes, and new features.
+
+. Check the IP configuration and hostname.
 
-Further configuration is done via the Proxmox web interface. Point your browser
-to the IP address given during installation (https://youripaddress:8006).
+. Check the timezone.
 
-NOTE: Default login is "root" (realm 'PAM') and the root password was defined
-during the installation process.
+. Check your xref:chapter_pve_firewall[Firewall settings].
 
 [[advanced_lvm_options]]
 Advanced LVM Configuration Options
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 7/9] installation: lvm-options: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (5 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 8/9] installation: zfs-options: " Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 9/9] installation: iso: reflow location and password dialog screenshots Christoph Heiss
  8 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

These changes are the result of basically "diffing" both documentations,
choosing the better prased/sounding sections. Some wording were also
slightly changed as necessary to further improve them.

The equivalent changes will be done for pmg-docs too, to ensure they are
really the same in the end.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 pve-installation.adoc | 9 +++++----
 1 file changed, 5 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)

diff --git a/pve-installation.adoc b/pve-installation.adoc
index e384f49..c6acc75 100644
--- a/pve-installation.adoc
+++ b/pve-installation.adoc
@@ -245,8 +245,8 @@ Advanced LVM Configuration Options
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
 The installer creates a Volume Group (VG) called `pve`, and additional Logical
-Volumes (LVs) called `root`, `data`, and `swap`. To control the size of these
-volumes use:
+Volumes (LVs) called `root`, `data`, and `swap`, if `ext4` or `xfs` is used. To
+control the size of these volumes use:
 
 `hdsize`::
 
@@ -284,8 +284,9 @@ configuration will be adapted accordingly.
 
 `minfree`::
 
-Defines the amount of free space left in the LVM volume group `pve`. With more
-than 128GB storage available the default is 16GB, else `hdsize/8` will be used.
+Defines the amount of free space that should be left in the LVM volume group
+`pmg`. With more than 128GB storage available, the default is 16GB, otherwise
+`hdsize/8` will be used.
 +
 NOTE: LVM requires free space in the VG for snapshot creation (not required for
 lvmthin snapshots).
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 8/9] installation: zfs-options: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (6 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 7/9] installation: lvm-options: " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 9/9] installation: iso: reflow location and password dialog screenshots Christoph Heiss
  8 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

These changes are the result of basically "diffing" both documentations,
choosing the better prased/sounding sections. Some wording were also
slightly changed as necessary to further improve them.

The equivalent changes will be done for pmg-docs too, to ensure they are
really the same in the end.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 pve-installation.adoc | 8 ++++----
 1 file changed, 4 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)

diff --git a/pve-installation.adoc b/pve-installation.adoc
index c6acc75..a94eb3b 100644
--- a/pve-installation.adoc
+++ b/pve-installation.adoc
@@ -294,10 +294,10 @@ lvmthin snapshots).
 [[advanced_zfs_options]]
 Advanced ZFS Configuration Options
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-The installer creates the ZFS pool `rpool`. No swap space is created but you can
-reserve some unpartitioned space on the install disks for swap. You can also
-create a swap zvol after the installation, although this can lead to problems.
-(see <<zfs_swap,ZFS swap notes>>).
+The installer creates the ZFS pool `rpool`, if ZFS is used. No swap space is
+created but you can reserve some unpartitioned space on the install disks for
+swap. You can also create a swap zvol after the installation, although this can
+lead to problems (see xref:zfs_swap[ZFS swap notes]).
 
 `ashift`::
 
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 9/9] installation: iso: reflow location and password dialog screenshots
  2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
                   ` (7 preceding siblings ...)
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 8/9] installation: zfs-options: " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-04 13:22 ` Christoph Heiss
  8 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-04 13:22 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: pve-devel

The same changes were done in commit

   4c35e536b ("installation: reword/expand/reflow and fix login thumbnail")

in pmg-docs to improve the layout as good as possible.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
---
 pve-installation.adoc | 4 ++--
 1 file changed, 2 insertions(+), 2 deletions(-)

diff --git a/pve-installation.adoc b/pve-installation.adoc
index a94eb3b..2b9cca7 100644
--- a/pve-installation.adoc
+++ b/pve-installation.adoc
@@ -147,7 +147,7 @@ settings can be changed under xref:advanced_zfs_options[`Advanced Options`].
 WARNING: ZFS on top of any hardware RAID is not supported and can result in data
 loss.
 
-[thumbnail="screenshot/pve-select-location.png", float="left"]
+[thumbnail="screenshot/pve-select-location.png"]
 
 The next page asks for basic configuration options like your location, time
 zone, and keyboard layout. The location is used to select a nearby download
@@ -156,7 +156,7 @@ to auto-detect these settings, so you only need to change them in rare
 situations when auto-detection fails, or when you want to use a keyboard layout
 not commonly used in your country.
 
-[thumbnail="screenshot/pve-set-password.png"]
+[thumbnail="screenshot/pve-set-password.png", float="left"]
 
 Next the password of the superuser (`root`) and an email address needs to be
 specified. The password must consist of at least 5 characters. It's highly
-- 
2.43.0





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* Re: [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-05  8:28   ` Gabriel Goller
  2024-03-05 12:00     ` Christoph Heiss
  0 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Gabriel Goller @ 2024-03-05  8:28 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion

On Mon Mar 4, 2024 at 2:22 PM CET, Christoph Heiss wrote:
>  The `root@pam` user is notified via email about available updates. Click the
>  'Changelog' button in the GUI to see more details about the selected update.
>  
> -You need a valid subscription key to access the `pve-enterprise` repository.
> -Different support levels are available. Further details can be found at
> -{pricing-url}.
> +As soon as updates are available, the `root@pam` user is notified via email
> +about the newly available packages. From the GUI, the 'Changelog' button in the
> +GUI can be used to see more details about the selected update.
> +Thus, you will never miss important security fixes.

The section about the 'Changelog' button is duplicated, it is already in
the paragraph above.
Also `GUI` appears twice in the same sentence, I would propose something
like this (if we use the second sentence): 

    The 'Changelog' button in the GUI can be used to see more 
    details about the selected update.






^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* Re: [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & " Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-05  8:38   ` Gabriel Goller
  2024-03-05 12:05     ` Christoph Heiss
  0 siblings, 1 reply; 18+ messages in thread
From: Gabriel Goller @ 2024-03-05  8:38 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion

On Mon Mar 4, 2024 at 2:22 PM CET, Christoph Heiss wrote:
> +When copying and setting up the packages has finished, you can reboot the
> +server. This will be done automatically after a few seconds by default.

I would remove the `by default` so that the sentence becomes:

    This will be done automatically after a few seconds.

> +. Log in using the `root` (realm 'PAM') username and the password chosen during
> +installation.

I think you need to fix the indentation here...





^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* Re: [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-05  8:28   ` Gabriel Goller
@ 2024-03-05 12:00     ` Christoph Heiss
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-05 12:00 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Gabriel Goller; +Cc: Proxmox VE development discussion

On Tue, Mar 05, 2024 at 09:28:21AM +0100, Gabriel Goller wrote:
> On Mon Mar 4, 2024 at 2:22 PM CET, Christoph Heiss wrote:
> >  The `root@pam` user is notified via email about available updates. Click the
> >  'Changelog' button in the GUI to see more details about the selected update.
> >
> > -You need a valid subscription key to access the `pve-enterprise` repository.
> > -Different support levels are available. Further details can be found at
> > -{pricing-url}.
> > +As soon as updates are available, the `root@pam` user is notified via email
> > +about the newly available packages. From the GUI, the 'Changelog' button in the
> > +GUI can be used to see more details about the selected update.
> > +Thus, you will never miss important security fixes.
>
> The section about the 'Changelog' button is duplicated, it is already in
> the paragraph above.
> Also `GUI` appears twice in the same sentence, I would propose something
> like this (if we use the second sentence):
>
>     The 'Changelog' button in the GUI can be used to see more
>     details about the selected update.
>

Yep, both paragraphs can indeed be a bit de-duplicated, will do!

Thanks!




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* Re: [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-05  8:38   ` Gabriel Goller
@ 2024-03-05 12:05     ` Christoph Heiss
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Christoph Heiss @ 2024-03-05 12:05 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Gabriel Goller; +Cc: Proxmox VE development discussion

Thanks for the review!

On Tue, Mar 05, 2024 at 09:38:02AM +0100, Gabriel Goller wrote:
> On Mon Mar 4, 2024 at 2:22 PM CET, Christoph Heiss wrote:
> > +When copying and setting up the packages has finished, you can reboot the
> > +server. This will be done automatically after a few seconds by default.
>
> I would remove the `by default` so that the sentence becomes:
>
>     This will be done automatically after a few seconds.

Well, the option to automatically reboot can be changed and is on by
default, so it makes sense IMO to have that bit in there. Although the
sentence can probably be rephrased a bit to make it read easier - I'll
see what I can come up with for v2.

>
> > +. Log in using the `root` (realm 'PAM') username and the password chosen during
> > +installation.
>
> I think you need to fix the indentation here...
>

Will do, although we have (esp. in pmg-docs) a mix-match of both styles,
since it seems not not matter to asciidoc.
I will then probably go about and fix all the other instances too, if
I'm already it at ..

>
>
> _______________________________________________
> pve-devel mailing list
> pve-devel@lists.proxmox.com
> https://lists.proxmox.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/pve-devel
>
>




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] applied: [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-06 17:16   ` Thomas Lamprecht
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Thomas Lamprecht @ 2024-03-06 17:16 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion, Christoph Heiss

Am 04/03/2024 um 14:22 schrieb Christoph Heiss:
> .. much like it many other repos.
> 
> Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
> ---
>  .gitignore | 3 +++
>  1 file changed, 3 insertions(+)
> 
>

applied, thanks!




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] applied: [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-06 17:16   ` Thomas Lamprecht
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Thomas Lamprecht @ 2024-03-06 17:16 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion, Christoph Heiss

Am 04/03/2024 um 14:22 schrieb Christoph Heiss:
> Seems like a pretty sensible thing to do here too.
> 
> Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
> ---
>  asciidoc/asciidoc-pve.conf | 1 +
>  getting-help.adoc          | 2 +-
>  pve-package-repos.adoc     | 2 +-
>  3 files changed, 3 insertions(+), 2 deletions(-)
> 
>

applied, thanks!




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] applied: [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-06 17:19   ` Thomas Lamprecht
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Thomas Lamprecht @ 2024-03-06 17:19 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion, Christoph Heiss

Am 04/03/2024 um 14:22 schrieb Christoph Heiss:
> It's mostly spelled BTRFS anyway in our documentation (and also the
> official casing AFAICS), so align a few instances where it spelled
> lowercase.

official spelling is really not consistent and includes at least btrfs,
BTRFS and Btrfs – but having use it one casing here makes it slightly
better so fine by me.


> 
> Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
> ---
>  local-btrfs.adoc | 8 ++++----
>  1 file changed, 4 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)
> 
>

applied, thanks!




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

* [pve-devel] applied: [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs
  2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
@ 2024-03-06 17:19   ` Thomas Lamprecht
  0 siblings, 0 replies; 18+ messages in thread
From: Thomas Lamprecht @ 2024-03-06 17:19 UTC (permalink / raw)
  To: Proxmox VE development discussion, Christoph Heiss

Am 04/03/2024 um 14:22 schrieb Christoph Heiss:
> This paragraph as phrased in pmg-docs sounds better & reads easier, so
> apply it here too.
> 
> Signed-off-by: Christoph Heiss <c.heiss@proxmox.com>
> ---
>  getting-help.adoc | 8 ++++----
>  1 file changed, 4 insertions(+), 4 deletions(-)
> 
>

applied, thanks!




^ permalink raw reply	[flat|nested] 18+ messages in thread

end of thread, other threads:[~2024-03-06 17:20 UTC | newest]

Thread overview: 18+ messages (download: mbox.gz / follow: Atom feed)
-- links below jump to the message on this page --
2024-03-04 13:22 [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 0/9] improve & unify installation(-related) documentation Christoph Heiss
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 1/9] gitignore: add package build outputs Christoph Heiss
2024-03-06 17:16   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 2/9] asciidoc: introduce `pricing-url` variable, much like pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
2024-03-06 17:16   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 3/9] local-btrfs: unify casing for btrfs Christoph Heiss
2024-03-06 17:19   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 4/9] getting-help: forum: align wording with pmg-docs Christoph Heiss
2024-03-06 17:19   ` [pve-devel] applied: " Thomas Lamprecht
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 5/9] package-repos: " Christoph Heiss
2024-03-05  8:28   ` Gabriel Goller
2024-03-05 12:00     ` Christoph Heiss
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 6/9] installation: iso: improve & " Christoph Heiss
2024-03-05  8:38   ` Gabriel Goller
2024-03-05 12:05     ` Christoph Heiss
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 7/9] installation: lvm-options: " Christoph Heiss
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 8/9] installation: zfs-options: " Christoph Heiss
2024-03-04 13:22 ` [pve-devel] [PATCH docs 9/9] installation: iso: reflow location and password dialog screenshots Christoph Heiss

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